Only One Small Mouse Click

By, F. Montforte D'Hubert...with kind thanks to Frederick Mann for permission to place this on his blog site.

I read this story in The New Yorker and wanted to share it with you:

http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2013/08/amazon-founder-says-he-clicked-on-washington-post-by-mistake.html?mobify=0

Andy Borowitz is an intelligent and insightful journalist.  I am not making this up.  He has been writing for The New Yorker for some time now, and, I must say, I like both his style and his accuracy.

How do I know that Andy has it right this time, regarding the sale of the Washington Post?  Well, because I almost bought the State of California by accident not too long ago.

It happened on one of those evenings when it had been stormy.  This happens often in South Florida during the summer, so that was not unusual.  What was unusual was that I simply could not sleep.  It was disconcerting and downright inconvenient, because I needed to be up early for a meeting.  I was burning moonlight.

Rather than watch late night television, I decided to get on the computer and, perhaps, do some journal writing, or catch up on email.  One of my emails came from a friend who shared a picture of a new t-shirt that really looked spiffy.  I am all about collecting t-shirts with unusual slogans and small pictures, and the one my friend showed off was especially enticing.  It was a California t-shirt.

Now, I have a number of friends who live in California or have lived there sometime in their past.  I have been to California a number of times and am a fan of the U. Cal.-Berkeley Bears.  I like bears, and UC Berkeley has some nice t-shirts.

So, at 11:45pm on this rainy night, I went to the State of California website.  It was well laid out, and I navigated my way to the "Online Store" section of the menu bar.  Because California is a big state, it has lots of products and kitch that one can purchase for a nominal fee.  We all know that California has had its financial woes of late, so, even the kitch is a tad pricey.  Nonetheless, I hunted around a bit in the "apparel" area and, finally, Voila!  There was the t-shirt my friend had showed me.

This product came in several colors and sizes for both men and women.  It had the color I wanted and the size that fits well.  I was in luck!  But....I was also getting sleepy by now.  "Come On!" I said to myself..."you can do this, shut down and be in bed in five minutes."

So, I popped my knuckles, took a deep breath, focused and "bam" began hitting the choice and check out keys in rapid order.  Fingers humming away, I clicked each window, as it came up.  Within five minutes, I had placed the choice in my shopping cart, provided the information, signaled the purchase and confirmed my decision -- that last button.  Up popped the completion page...of which I made a copy and simply threw it on my desk, as I shut my system down.  Sleep came fast.

Next morning, after my meeting, I was tooling about our home town -- doing the usual errands -- when I got this call from my bank on my cell phone (unusual).  The lady on the other end seemed a bit frantic and halting in her tone and presentation.

"Sir, can you please verify that you are the owner of this account (name, address)?"  "Yes," I replied, a bit apprehensively.  She proceeded with the usual security questions, to which I gave spot-on answers.

When that was done, I preempted her with one of my own questions, "Excuse me, but you seem a bit distracted, and you don't usually call my cell phone.  Is there a problem I should know about?"

Her response came in a frame of hesitancy.  "Uh, yes, we seem to have a problem with your account.  There is a request for $2.5 million to be paid out through your account.  The requesting agency is, well, unusual."  Now was my time to be hesitant and frantic.

"I'm sorry, but did you say $2.5 million as in 2 million, five hundred thousand American dollars?"  The bank lady could tell I was suddenly edgy.  "Yes sir, $2 million, five-hundred thousand plus $21.45."

"So, what is the last little bit all about?" I queried...mouth getting drier by the second.

"Well, the itemized breakdown says that the final $21.45 is for a 'medium blue, xl, t-shirt' which includes the tax.  There is no tax on the seriously big amount."  Now we were both acting like people who had been hit up-side the head with a frying pan.  My ears were ringing.

"Tell me please, ma'am, how is it that I have a pending $2.5 million charge to my bank card.  I don't have that kind of cash anywhere."  I had, fortunately, stopped my car on the edge of a shopping center parking lot.  My hands were shaking.  How am I going to explain this to She Who Must Be Obeyed?

There was a moment of awkward silence.  Then, the bank lady said, in what seemed to be both a weary and wary voice, "The purchase order request for that large amount simply says, The State of California and All Not Privately Owned Properties and Businesses."  Yep, she said exactly that.  Me too, this had to be a joke.  I asked as much...mustering all the energy from my now very dry mouth and parched lungs.

"No sir, both our bank manager and the regional manager have checked the validity of the request.  You did, at 11:51pm last evening, check out of the State of California official website store with the purchase of the entire state of California and one t-shirt.  It is legitimate, and the Sacramento State House placed a call to our bank president...just as I began my call to you...wanting to know when to expect the transfer of funds.  It is why I seemed so distracted.  This is very unusual."

"Unusual?!!" I croaked.  "This is bloody impossible, outrageous and a joke!  It isn't even pay day!"  I added the last quip hoping to finally get her to laugh and admit that the bank was having a good time at my expense on this moist and hot morning.

It was no joke.  The manager came on the phone and gave me the routing number.  We ended the call with me, now all buzzed with nerves, heading home to take a look at the purchase confirmation sheet that was still laying on my desk, where I had casually tossed it before retiring for the night.  Seeming that some bizarre mix-up had occurred, the bank manager suggested I give a call to customer service at the State of California Online Store to see (and she said this), "What the hell this is all about."

To my utter horror and amazement, on the purchase confirmation sheet, on my study desk, were two purchases:  a t-shirt and The State of California sans private property and privately owned businesses.  That is a lot of land and infrastructure.  It is also a lot of overhead.  Owning California is like owning an old home.  Not only is there ongoing upkeep; there is also the neglect and renovation needed from the missteps of previous owners.  But, the State of California is the third largest state in the U.S.A.  It is worth gazillions...not just $2.5 million.  I don't have $2.5 million...never have, never will (unless I win the lottery).

The next couple of hours are blurred and too complex to transfer to text.  Ultimately, the customer service representative at the State of California website store (a nice, but firm, guy with an accent that made it hard for me to communicate well), who simply wanted the purchase order to be closed, called some office in Sacramento.  I could hear the "What the f...?" responses and on-hold buttons being pushed...as the customer service rep moved through a rather long chain of command.  Nobody wanted to handle this.  I was really nervous.  Stuff on this level gets real serious, and unusual people show up at one's doorstep driving black SUVs, with Sig-Sauers tucked under their jackets.

After about 14 expletive laden responses and on-hold sequences, there came a click and a smooth, mature and unusually calm voice.  "Is the customer on the line right now?"  The service rep answered in the affirmative with a crisp, "sir" at the end.  "I am connecting you now, sir."

"Good morning from Sacramento," said the voice, "I understand there is some kind of problem.  I am Jerry Brown, the Governor.  How can I help you?"  Now it was my turn, "What the f...?"  The actual governor of California?  "None other," came the reply.  There was a long pause.

I finally was able to more or less sputter the story to Gov. Brown.  I told him what I think happened on the website.  I was getting sleepy and assumed that all the buttons I clicked had to do with buying one simple, damned t-shirt.  I did not realize I was buying an entire state.  I don't want a state.  It's too big and too much responsibility.  Besides, I can't even afford a state.  How is it that the state puts itself on sale on its own website?

Gov. Brown sighed heavily and said, "Well, it is true.  We have had our problems, and we are not out of the woods yet to be sure.  I asked the State House for some creative ideas on how we could raise revenues for operations.  I have all my staff looking into this.  I want you to give me about 2 hours to see what we can do.  I will personally call you back."

At just after 4:00pm that afternoon...just as I poured my 11th cup of coffee (used up all my really good fresh ground stuff that day), my cellphone buzzed.  It was Gov. Brown...the governor...on the phone.  "Hey, Mr. D'Hubert, I am sorry to keep you waiting so long.  These things can be hard to track down.  We have a number of goofy state representatives.  No one wanted to chat...especially the ones from San Diego and Bakersfield.  Got a minute to let me explain?"

"Yes, sir, but first, what about that charge on my bank card?"  I was supremely nervous and was tired of staring out from behind the drapes of my living room for black SUVs.  "Oh, for crying out loud...I'm sorry...no, that charge has been cleared.  You aren't buying the state after all."  My release of tension was probably audible for blocks.  It seemed to distress the Governor a bit.

Composure regained, I asked -- rather meekly -- what had happened.

The Governor summed it up this way:  We did some tracking, and we found an article that you had written on 6 July 2012 about the 4th of July fireworks debacle in San Diego two days earlier.  You might remember that.  Well, my security staff have been doing some checking this afternoon.  We found that a group of state representatives may have hired a fellow to hack into our system and enable a sale of the public entities of the State of California....uh, on our own state website.  Using your article from last year, we have tried to trace the persons you interviewed but have not been successful.  The person of real interest is this computer nerd/agri-business person known only as "Weed."  Did you ever get to meet him?

It all came back to me.  A whole year later, and here it was again.  I scrambled to my computer, while still on the phone, and hunted my archived files.  Sure enough, published on 6 July 2012 was the article about the San Diego fireworks two days earlier.  All the characters came back vividly into memory.  Then, I remembered Gov. Brown, " Uh, oh, sorry, sir.  I have found the article.  The only person in that piece that I didn't meet was the one that Dr. Plank called 'Weed'."

Yep, he's the one.  Never met him, eh?  Okay.  You just happened to be the guy to get online and hit the buttons it seems.  It could have happened to any customer...maybe even a few saw it and simply thought it a joke.  This state has a reputation for being goofy on occasion.  You must have been really tired to hit that button.

"Yes, sir. My late night shopping days are over.  How are you going to find this Weed guy, if he is the one...if it is okay to ask," I was tentative in my request.

Well, the security folks are telling us that this guy is hugely crafty.  Knocked power out of half of California's coastal areas a few years back.   There is a whole legend about this guy emerging in back alley stories.  Several of the internal intelligence guys tell me that he pulls these capers and then hides under his bed for days on end....so they hear.  We just don't have the manpower to go to every home in California and look under beds.  Plus, he hasn't left any cyber footprints that we can yet find.  Rest assured, we are on it.
Then, the Governor asked me a strange question:   You wouldn't happen to be interested in owning the town of Bakersfield...and possibly all of Kern County...would you?  I know it's in the south central desert area of the state, but it might prove to be a good challenge for a retired guy like you.  Lots of goofy stuff to research there.

"No thanks!"

(Sigh), Okay, then.....

"Governor, I am grateful that I don't have to own California...much less govern it.  I am very grateful for not having a $2.5 million dollar purchase hanging on to my credit balance."

The governor and I finished our conversation with mutual pleasantries.  Now, I read every drop box and button upon which I am asked to click.  I certainly don't want to accidentally buy Washington, DC!

So, for Jeff Bezos:  If you pressed the wrong button to buy the Washington Post, my best advice is to call Gov. Jerry Brown in Sacramento.  Maybe the Grahams will understand.  It's a Washington thing anyway.

Have a great day!

F. Montforte D'Hubert

(Frederick Mann allows Mr. D'Hubert to occasionally blog on this site.  He is an old style Florida boy...born and raised in the swampy part of South Florida.  He has been several things...among them a good journalist.  He was capable of getting to the nub of unusual and complex events -- finding truths and getting interviews in ways that mystify his colleagues.  The earlier article mentioned here is posted on this blog site for the date 6 July 2012.  It has some real characters in it to be sure.)

A New Journey -- Part 8: Harmony and Balance

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBZ7-NUZoJc

Just open your eyes and realize the way it's always been

Just open your mind and you will find

The way it's always been, 

 Just open your heart

And that's a start

--Lyrics by Thomas Edge of the Moody Blues, from the song, "Balance"

from the album, "A Question of Balance," released in 1970

(the full song, "Balance" can be heard on the above YouTube link)

Background

Unquestionably, for me, one of the greatest rock groups in history is The Moody Blues.  I own every album (CD) they have made, and I go back to them on a regular basis.  Their music is a bend of classic rock and philosophical and mystical lyrics.  There is a lot to be pondered in their music.  Truth is, what they have to say is probably even more relevant in our contemporary culture.

Growing up as a post-WWII Baby Boomer, I was taught to think for myself and focus on "doing better than my parents."  I'm not sure how often Dad said to me something like, "You need to stay focused, work hard, and get a college degree..."  What came out of the 1950s and 60s was a fast growing individualism that doubled-down on the 19th century image of the "rugged frontier individualist."  

Of course, we valued cultural community.  It was necessary to have a team that would get to the moon before the Russians.  Being on a team most always means being in some kind of competition with another team.  That's fine for sports or friendly games.  However, we have taken the competitive role to extremes.  Competition, as we now "play" it, means that someone has to win, and someone has to lose.  It means that someonw has to be right, and someone has to be wrong.  Teams now generally reflect a group of people who are close enough in what they think and believe, that the individual can feel safe, justified and protected in that particular shell of "herding instinct."

What I just said is not universally the case...just predominantly so.  Even in the institutional religious sector, we are a group of individualists herding together under a certain banner.  We are production and quantity oriented.  There are parishes in the Episcopal Church, for instance, where new parishioners are interviewed (yes, interviewed) by the priest or lay leaders to see if their way of thinking and believing "fit in with who we are."  Folks have come into every parish, where I have been Rector, with stories of how they were either kindly or sternly told, "You will be happier in another parish."  That is a kind of individualism that sociologists call the "group ego."

Story

After four years of college and receiving my B.A. degree, I did something many college graduates would not do.  I enlisted in the United States Navy.  Now, let me be assure you, this was not my idea.  I had shifted my entire lifepath from science/medicine to being a Priest in the Episcopal Church.  I was made a Postulant (first stage in the process) in April 1972 in the Diocese of Central Florida.  The Bishop of that diocese, at that time, was William Hopkins Folwell.  

During a conference with Bishop Folwell in April 1972, he reflected that he was sympathetic with my views on the Vietnam War (I was very much all about getting out of there...immediately).  He listened, with patience, to my carefully crafted reasons for where I found myself in life at that moment.

Then, without so much as a warning shot, he fired this at me:  "Fred, if you are to be ordained a priest and be responsible for the spiritual well-being of a congregation of any size, you will encounter many ways of interpreting scripture and doing theology.  You will have to learn how to hold in balance a diverse gathering of people...coming from all different backgrounds and viewpoints...all wanting to experience God's Love."  Then, after a long pause, he added, "You need time to gain the ability and resources to create such a balance.  I suggest you spend some time in the military."  

It's a long story regarding what happened over the next 3 weeks.  Short version:  I told Bishop Folwell he was crazy...for which he forgave me as being a "passionate moment of surprise and indiscretion."  I found out I could get a commission in the U.S. Navy and work in the surface intelligence field, but the time of getting into OCS, completing the training process for the specialty rating, and required time of active duty would put me out at around 1979.  Bishop Folwell wanted me out of seminary at that time.  It was then he suggested I enlist.  I was stunned!  For a second time I told him, "You really are crazy!"  He simply held up two fingers, smiled and said, "Don't let the third finger appear."

I did the research and found out how I could move through an enlistment period that would combine 3 years active duty and three years reserve duty...during which I would go to seminary to earn the Master's degree required for ordination.  He immediately concurred, and my "fate" was immediately sealed.  I was going to boot camp.

In Recruit Training Duty (boot camp), I was placed in a training company comprised of 76 people.  Two of us were college graduates, three others had 2 years of college.  The rest were high school graduates, with exception of 2 drop-outs.   I was 21 years old.  Only two others were that age.  The average age was 19.  We were White, African American, Latino, Native American (2) and Asian (1).  There were conservative, liberal, "I don't give a shit" and some who were still trying to figure all that out.  Most were from working class and middle class families.  A small group were from white collar families.  Most were escaping being drafted into the Army by joining the Navy.  Only 14 of us enlisted without pressure of draft (I was under a different kind of pressure...non sequitur to the blend of folks).

What I found in my active duty experience was very different from what I had thought and believed about the "military complex" as a college student.  I found all kinds of people working together to make a system combat ready.  Some of my best friends in those years were people with whom I might have never thought to associate myself otherwise.  We were a diversity within a unity.  It was not perfect by any means, but there was a harmony and balance I had not seen anywhere else up to that point.

Synthesis

Hegelian Dialectic (a philosophical model) is depicted as a loose spiral, where the beginning point represents a way of thinking (thesis), the point where the spiral curves upward is another way of thinking (antithesis), and the point above the beginning of the spiral is a new way of thinking that incorporates the best of the other two (synthesis).  This synthesis, then, becomes a new thesis for the next phase of evolving thought and resulting action.  My way of "doing business" has been a form of Hegelian Dialectic for at least 35 years.  For those who keep notes on schools of philosophy and theology, I am also Aristotelian, a Thomist (Thomas Aquinas),  Rahnerian (Karl Rahner) and Jungian (Carl Jung).

Immediately upon locating myself, as I did above, those who read this and work in the same areas I have worked will quickly try to "pigeon hole" me into a particular category of priest, partisan or citizen.  What if I added to the mix that I have experience I value in Charismatic Renewal, read a lot of N.T. Wright, Karl Barth, John Macquarrie, Plato and Abraham Maslow (the latter being the focus of my final undergraduate research for my BA in Psychology)?  Now, that muddies the waters a bit.  Some of those would appear to a number of my colleagues as being "oppositional" to how I described myself.  Truth is, I am grounded in the former and do work in all the former and latter.  

"For the good of the Service" is a quiet motto for all branches of the military.  One goes where one's skills will be needed and put to use...where one will fit into the working team of that command.   In the Church, it is a little different.  A Priest in the Episcopal Church will be called based upon both experience and skill sets needed for a parish.  However, one is not entering a "command team."  One is entering a diverse community that functions intermittently.  

The real question in community is: What meets the needs of the largest number of people within this community?  It is never about "my way or the highway."  It is not about forging a diverse group into a single minded entity.  If it is, then we are seriously playing a dangerous game.  We are creating a "cult of the personality"... one based upon the ego and mindset of the leader...the consummate individualist (if they are thinking this way).

St. Paul was aware of how diversity becomes unity.  He used the human body as an example.  "If the body was all eye, how could it hear?  If all ear, how could it smell?  As it is, we see that God has carefully placed each part of the body right where it is needed.....For no matter how significant you are, it is only because of what you are a part of.?"  (1 Corinthians 12:18 and 19)

It is interesting that many of my generation came together in the 1960s to engage societal change but then dissipated to engage in forging individual lives.  Now, our generation is in large measure responsible for the rancor and paralysis of our socio-political environment.  This is not a universal comment, but it reflects our current cultural "temperature" pretty well I think.  

Conclusion

There isn't one.  We are in a flow that is one that cannot be stopped.  It can be altered or shifted, but it cannot stop.  What I have learned in my own process is only a moment of reflection.  It will shift as I move forward.  If I believed that I simply must "take my medicine, exercise and eat sensibly," I would be stuck in a condition that would ultimately deteriorate.  Where is the antithesis to that particular thesis?

My new journey is, in fact, an antithesis.  It is an invitation for my bodily system -- made up of a huge diversity of cells that do thousands of different functions -- to engage in a systemically balanced kind of harmony.  It is dependent on my mental, emotional and spiritual leadership.  That leadership working in its harmony will make appropriate choices "for the best good of the whole."  

Unless something radical happens in the next day or so, this is my last reflection in this series.  I have moved through nine days and ending the detox period tomorrow.  My body is coming into some new synthesis and balance.  Like St. Paul, I trust the balance and integrity of body can reflect the balance and integrity of relationships external to the body.  It is why we have been placed here, I believe ... to learn how to function in harmony and balance as a whole people.

Today's Numbers

• Fasting Blood Glucose:  88.  I am now running a daily average of 89 --- well within the range of normal fasting blood sugar.
• Weight:  232.  I have lost 9 lbs. in 9 days.  As the glycogen stored in liver and muscle "fat" cells continues to be burned, the weight will come off.  When I shift to fat burning, it will slow.  According to the docs, my best weight will be 215.
• Blood Pressure:  134/73.  I had a chat with my cardiologist's nurse this morning (in her office).  They are not momentarily concerned with this.  They want some numbers after I take medication in the mornings.  I am doing it immediately upon awakening...before medication.  Okay, we'll see.

Since I have shared this journey...partly as a way of holding myself accountable and partly because it is community, and we all deal with these same issues...I will provide periodic updates via this blog.  No long postings with reflective theology or philosophy.  Just the facts.

Love and Blessings,

Fred+

A New Journey -- Part 7: Must John Barleycorn Really Die?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8878chOvfI

"There were three men came out of the west, their fortunes for to try

And these three men made a solemn vow

John Barleycorn must die"

-- First stanza of an early English folk tune, "John Barleycorn"

-- Tune reframed by Steve Winwood and Traffic:  Released in 1970 in 

the album, "John Barleycorn Must Die" (click on link above to hear

Steve Winwood sing the song)

Temperance

The American Temperance Society was founded in the United States in 1826.  It was not the first group to attempt to either curtail or prohibit the use of alcoholic beverages.  Two small movements were underway in the colonies and shortly after the American Revolution. There were many temperance societies in countries around the world -- having various levels of success.  In the United States, there were three major periods of Temperance Society activity -- the third and final being from 1893-1933.  

In 1893, The Rev. Howard Hyde Russell founded the Anti-Saloon League (ASL).  Under various leaders, the ASL gained political traction.  With the motto, "The Church in action against the saloon," the ASL achieved massive support from most all religious groups in the United States.  The success of this effort paid off when, on 18 December 1917, the 18th Amendment to the Constitution of the United States was passed by Congress.  With ratification by more than 3/4 of the states, Prohibition went into formal law on 16 January 1920.  Prohibition banned "the manufacture, sale, and transportation of alcoholic beverages in the United States and its possessions." However, Prohibition did not outlaw the purchase or consumption of alcohol products.  The 18th Amendment was repealed in 1933 with the passage of the 21st Amendment.  It is the only instance in United States history that a constitutional amendment was repealed.

[Sidebar here:  It is why I am so wearied by cries of losing 2nd Amendment rights.  An Amendment can only be repealed by an act of Congress with 3/4 of the states approving to be ratified into law.  I think it is time to give that old "protect my constitutional rites" gig a rest]

A lot of complicated things happened during the period of Prohibition.  All kinds of books and movies have been written and made exploring the societal struggles during the 1920s...leading to the Great Depression.  The emergence of organized crime in the scope of the Mafia (as only one example) made its mark by bootlegging alcoholic beverages and laundering both the product and the money.  This posting isn't about exploring all the nuances of Prohibition.  However, the effects of temperance movements and its legitimacy is of value in what follows.

Nutrition

I do not often refer to the "For Dummies" books that are published, but when I do, I refer to one that has some depth and summarizes current science and/or technology.  Such is the case with the website "How Your Body Processes Alcohol...for Dummies."  It is good reading and available at:                                                                                http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/how-your-body-processes-alcohol.html

This is not to infer, in any way, that anyone is a dummy.  Both history and physiology can get complicated.  It is sometimes good to have the material presented in a way that streamlines the technical language.  It becomes easier to digest the information (sorry, I couldn't resist) and make use of the facts.  

• Alcohol is not a sugar, nor is it metabolized as a sugar.  Alcohol moves directly through the stomach walls into the circulatory system (blood).  
• The body considers alcohol a toxin (poison) and sends it directly to the liver.  Here is where something really important happens.   Because it is a toxin, the liver stops enzymatic action on carbohydrates and other sugars in order to deal with the alcohol.  This process is slow.  It takes about an hour for the system to metabolize 1 oz. of alcohol (about 12 oz. of beer, 5 oz. of wine, or 1.5 oz. of whiskey).  
• While you are drinking alcohol, your blood sugar will actually drop for a while.  This is because of the metabolic action by the liver, cited above.
• Eventually, alcohol is removed as ascetic acid.
• Because it is free-flowing in our bloodstream before metabolizing, alcohol affects neuro-receptors in the brain, the heart and the lungs.  This is one reason a breathalyzer works so well.  
• One gains weight with alcohol consumption, because the body "reads" the temporary reduction of glucose (due to suspended action of the liver) as needing more fuel.  We eat more.  In college, remember the beer parties with the Domino's Pizza deliveries following later that evening?   Come on...yes, you do.  
• The more one drinks, the longer it takes to remove the alcohol.  It takes a long time for the liver enzymes to break it down.  Three beers, three glasses of wine, or 3.0 oz of standard 80 proof whiskey can take up to four hours to fully metabolize.  Food you have already eaten is not being processed (the glucose part).  The body craves more food, and one keeps eating until the body begins to register a new flow of glucose.   By the time that happens, there is an insulin spike that can be as much as five times normal.  If this happens often enough, the genetic disposition for Type II diabetes can be triggered.
• Remember:  Alcohol is not the only thing in a drink of any kind.  Beer and a number of whiskeys contain barley.  Other major grains, like corn, rye and wheat, are used as a base for distilling alcohol.  So, there are also carbohydrates in what one is drinking.  These are, in fact, processed like all carbohydrates:  into blood sugar -- glucose.   The darker beers, for instance, contain up to four times more carbohydrates that "pale ales."  Blended Scots Whisky (Scotch to this side of the Pond) contains more carbohydrates than single malts.  
• Also, we rarely drink straight anything -- except for beer and wine.  One must take into account the glycemic load of the mixer one is using.  Unless it is water or club soda, there is a whopping amount of fructose, sucrose and carbohydrate going down with that tequila in a margarita (as one example only).  True story:  I had a large margarita at a Mexican restaurant in Kansas City three years ago...just three days before seeing my endocrinology diabetes nurse.  My blood work showed a significant spike in both fasting blood sugar and triglycerides.  Yep, it was the margarita that did that...still showing up three days after consumption.
• Alcohol does not make cirrhosis of the liver.  However, alcohol taxes the liver and actually "fatigues" it.  This leads to inflammation and subsequent scaring of the internal liver tissues.  This is cirrhosis.  Other things can cause cirrhosis as well, so be informed.

Story

I will tell only one of three events in my younger years that is the kind of thing that can trigger a lot of problems:  binge drinking.  At the University of Florida, I lived in the Beaty Towers -- a "high rise" dorm for juniors through graduate studies students.  In 1972, a number of us living on the 8th floor of Beaty East (the men's dorm tower) were seniors.  In mid-May 1972, just about 3.5 weeks before graduation, we were entering our last period of final exams.  Us 8th floor guys decided to sponsor a senior party for us and some of our friends (that would ultimately mean about 70 of us).  One of my really good friends down the hall had access to Budweiser and Michelob products through his dad.  For next to nothing, we hauled three full kegs from Tampa to Gainesville -- along with a lot of complimentary 16 oz. plastic mugs.

On that fateful Saturday night in May, the grand party commenced.  Early on, one of my other good friends on the 8th floor got into a bantering conversation with me regarding our next chapter of life.  He was going into the Marine Corps, and I was going into the Navy.  Can you see where this is going?  

A bet was made.  Whichever of us could consume the most 16 oz. mugs of beer and remain standing would be declared the winner -- to the exaltation of his branch of service.  Being of Scots lineage, I could not let "my team" look bad.  I waded in.

One of the guys not drinking was the coordinator.  He filled each of our mugs and kept a record of what each of us consumed...on a board tacked onto the central hallway bulletin board.  I will not bother with the details of that evening.  It was, in many ways a great party.  I kept drinking.  Tim kept drinking.

At 12:35am -- four hours later, I consumed the last of my 22nd beer......seriously.  I did not realize that Tim had collapsed in a heap as he was just beginning his 22nd mug.  I had won.  I am telling this via what was told me.  I don't remember.  It is told that I threw my empty mug against the bulletin board and starting singing "Anchors Aweigh" in a loud baritone.  I fell down, and a group of my friends carried me to my room...and my bed.  During the remaining hours of that night, I got pretty sick.  My three roommates swear to this day that I was in the bathroom, moaning in my toxic stew and beseeching, "God, if you love me, kill me!"  I swear I do not remember this.

I was 21 years old.  Yet, I was a fairly new Postulant for Holy Orders in the Episcopal Church (the first official stage leading to seminary and ordination as a Priest).  As was my custom, I crawled out of bed at 9am, somehow got cleaned up and dressed.  I made it downtown to Trinity Episcopal Church in time for the 10am Eucharist.  The music and liturgical sounds caused my head to pound so that I thought my ears would explode.  I got to the rail to receive Communion and caught a scent of the consecrated wine.  I left immediately to find the restroom.  My intentions were good, but my body was in a terrible toxic mess.

I had a major paper to finish.  I had written it, but it needed to be typed.  I got back to my room and settled down at my desk and typewriter.  Every tap of the key was like a giant bass drum beating right beside me.  That Sunday was the worst day of my life.

Honestly, I am not at all proud of this.  It took nearly four days to start feeling like my old self again.  I have not, to this day, gotten drunk again.  

Now

The English folk song, "John Barleycorn Must Die" personifies the the cereal crop, barley, that was essential in most alcoholic beverage production in early England and European continent.  It got picked up by temperance societies in many cultures and used as a rallying cry for "killing the evil spirits of alcohol."  All cultures seem to have a love-hate relationship with distilled and brewed beverages.  

Like most things, alcohol in itself is not evil.  In fact, there is strong medical evidence for benefits from moderate amounts ... especially wine (and red wine to be most specific).  It is how we use alcohol -- or any consumable -- and knowing our limitations.

It was a damned foolish thing I did at age 21.  It could have very easily become deadly with alcohol poisoning.  I was fortunate -- both to not get sicker than I was, and to recognize that danger for the future.  

For all of my adult life, an occasional beer, glass of wine or a good Scots Whisky on the rocks is a nice treat.  It simply does not interest me to have more than two or three of those events in a week...and not more than one drink.  There are weeks that go by where I consume nothing alcoholic.  I have done Fifth Step work for persons in Alcoholics Anonymous and know the addictive process.

However, that same addictive process (it is both genetic and in the neural receptor centers of the brain) holds us captive to sugar, modern wheat products and simple carbohydrates.  Those are also the things that trigger Type II Diabetes and other metabolic disorders.

St. Paul counseled his young faith communities to exercise moderation in all things.  Part of who we are and why we are here is to be stewards and to hold all things in balance -- most especially ourselves.  What we put in our mouths affects every part of our organic being.  How do we acknowledge and celebrate the gift we call life?

During the detox phase of this journey, no alcohol is allowed.  As I move into the next stages of lifestyle and food choice adjustments, it may be an option to have an occasional beverage.  My rule for this will be to reduce that day's intake of foods that could be processed as glucose.  By what amount, I don't yet know.  It is a conversation with my body that will yield the answer.  It will sound like, "if you want to enjoy that, leave out this..."

Today's numbers:

Fasting Blood Glucose:  88.  This is the fifth day of below 100

Weight: 233.  I lost the pound that came back yesterday.  Net loss, 7 lbs in seven days.

Blood Pressure:  134/72.  This is some indication of a lowering, though it is not much

This is beyond my expectations.  It may be that my detox time is ending, and I am ready to move to the next phase.  I have submitted my log to my mentor.  

Love and Blessings!

Fred+

A New Journey -- Supplement Part 6: Important Information

After completing the posting under the title, "Doris Gets Her Oats," I had a couple of questions arise about my exercise routine.  The scope of the questions indicated some supplemental information.

1. I am not a doctor.  I have never played one on television.  I haven't stayed in a Holiday Inn Express in over a year.  The information I provide is what is working for me.  I am regularly in some kind of consultation with three medical professionals:  Primary Care Physician, Cardiologist, Orthopedic Surgeon.  They are also in touch with each other.  It is critical that one not begin a course of exercise or radically change one's lifestyle without consulting a medical professional.  
2. If you are over 40 yrs old, it is strongly advised that you speak with a medical professional regarding a Stress EKG study.  This is a painless procedure that takes about 45 minutes.  You are hooked up to an EKG (Electrocardiogram) machine while on a treadmill.  This study observes your heart at various levels of stress as both the incline and speed of the treadmill increase over a given period of time -- usually no more than 15 minutes.  This is important especially if you have a family history of heart issues.
3. This is not essential, but I have found it helpful to check in with an exercise physiologist as I begin a  new exercise routine.  This is especially true if you have a cardiac condition or orthopedic issues.  Some exercises and equipment are more suitable than others, if there are such issues.  Many gyms and health clubs do not have "floor specialists."  They are usually college or adult persons who do not have a specialization in techniques that prevent injury.  This is one reason I have spent just a tad more and enrolled in facilities that have personnel with degrees in exercise physiology or physical therapy.
4. Pain is not your friend!  Take this one to the bank.  If what you are doing causes pain, don't do it.  Something isn't right.  It is common to feel a little sore or stiff in the early stages of a new exercise routine, but it should last no longer than a day following the exercise.  Once you are in a routine and conditioning begins, a slight soreness will be felt as you increase weights or resistance.  Do not "work through the pain."  It's a crock...and back away from anyone suggesting it.  It will save you from future injury.

Aerobic Training.  There are really only two things that are important here:  

• Heart Rate:  How fast your heart is beating during an aerobic series.  Best advice is to consult the charts available that give age ranges and suggested target heart rates for extended periods.  Example:  Because I have a cardiac anomaly, my cardiologist do not want me to exceed 120 beats per minute (bpm) over an extended time.  Above that, the coronary arteries tend to no longer deliver oxygen to my heart efficiently.  Heart Rate is the key for any aerobic workout.
• Time:  What is the most effective amount of time for aerobic training.  Really, less than sustained 20 minutes is only marginally effective for cardiac health.  Most professionals suggest 30 minutes.  Some suggest longer.  In my particular situation, the docs want an average of 40 to 50 minutes whenever possible and 30 minutes minimum.  
• Forget the other number values.  How fast one is pedaling or moving, or how many calories one is burning is of no real concern.  Sustaining target heart rate for a set period of time that is good for you will yield the best health benefits.  That is advice I have heard from every credible exercise physiologist and cardiologist.  If you do those to values, metabolic efficiency is enhanced over time.

Weight Training.  This is a huge area

• Go Slow.  If your goal is to be strong and lean, there is an entirely different method of working out than if your goal is to "bulk up."  From my military requirements to the present, it has never been either necessary or interesting for me to be bulked.  My body works best when the muscles are strong, tight and doing their work efficiently.  Being "in shape" really means having one's entire system working in harmony and being in balance.  Historically, I have been more efficient and capable than someone hugely bulked up.  Their range of motion and rate of response slows with over-development.  Still, it's an individual choice:  Brute strength, or Effective efficiency.
• Free Weights.  Always have a person who will "spot" you as you lift -- especially lifting bars overhead or doing controlled squats with a bar on your shoulders.  I suffer permanent damage by getting in a hurry and sacrificing good judgement when doing a series of military press routines in 1974 (lifting a bar with weights from shoulder level to the full extension of arms overhead).  I went to a level of weight only ten pounds heavier than my usual.  I started losing control in mid lift.  There was no one behind me to grab the bar and stabilize my control.  I failed to simply throw the bar away in front of me.  I tried to control a "loose descent" and twisted my right should backward...dropping the bar behind me.  This was a very bad move.  I paid for that (in many ways) 36 years later.  Start light and work up slowly...only when you can do three sets of 12 reps each comfortably on three different workouts should you go to the next level by adding weight.  You don't need a spotter for "dumbells" (also called "hand weights").  The only place a spotter could be helpful is if you are on your back on a bench with a barbell positioned above your head to do a modified tricep exercise or upper pectoral extension.  Twice, I have seen someone lose the hand weight and have it smash into his face.  Broken noses and lost teeth don't need to happen.  Ask for an assist.  Good weight trainers are always happy to help.
• Machine Weights.  By far the easiest and safest -- under most circumstances.  The trick with machines is cadence and having the moving parts set to the right adjustment for your height and build (i.e longer or shorter arms and legs).  A badly set machine can cause pain.  I always get a professional to walk me through the exercises I will be doing and adjusting each machine.  The absolute best is working out in a place that uses FitLinxx or similar computer enhancement.  The master server saves all your settings.  When you go to a particular machine, for which you have been set-up, and plug in your code, the screen will tell you the settings and the weight you have been using.  No need to try to remember all that.  I currently use seven machines on a FitLinxx system.  I just show up, log in, do some stretching and begin.  

Of course there are lots of ways to get good exercise.  This is my particular routine.  I also hike and swim.  I have been an avid canoeist, bicyclist and like kayaking.  I have played tennis, raquetball and golf.  However, in all of those, I have found that my gym training has improved my ability and skills in all those areas of interest.  Most of all, it has given me balance between internal metabolic function and external interaction with my environment.  If gym exercise/training is not for you, there are several good books that guide you through floor routines in your home.  For several years, I used a U.S. Army fitness book with various floor exercises and combined it with Hatha Yoga for stretching and strengthening joints.  It worked well.  But, heck, I'm just a gym rat.  Couldn't stay away.

Find a time that is good for you and do something.  Yoga and Tai Chi are also good...as is aerobic dancing.  The secret is doing something long enough to build cardiac efficiency and work out the largest number of muscles.

This covers the questions I have been asked, I think.  PLEASE, don't take my thoughts on personal wellness and simply go start something.  Even if you don't like allopathic medicine, getting a metabolic panel done and a stress ekg will give you a personal baseline that will meet your needs.  There is no "one way" to do this.

Blessings,

Fred+

A New Journey -- Part 6: Doris Gets Her Oats

"I Dig a Pygmy, by Charles Hawtry and the Deaf Aids.

  Phase one in which Doris gets her oats."

-- John Lennon, the opening monologue to the song, "Two of Us"

 (Song written by Paul McCartney, first released on the 1969 album, "Let It Be")

I was in the gym on this past Friday morning.  It was around 9 am, and folks were arriving who either receive physical therapy or are part of a cardiac rehab class.  A man and woman were talking rather heatedly to a physical therapist near where I was stretching.  The complaint went something like this, "But we come here almost every day to exercise...using the aerobic machine and the works.  We are both still gaining weight!"  

The physical therapist -- a young woman probably in her late twenties -- remained poised and circumspect.  "Perhaps it is what you are eating that is causing you to gain the weight," she said rather thoughtfully (so it sounded).  The woman shot back quickly, "Such crap!  That's just your way of saying you folks don't know your job."  The physical therapist -- still retaining professional composure -- simply said, "If that's how you feel about what we are doing, it may be best that you talk to the department director."  The three walked into the enclosed area of the physical therapy department and disappeared.  

I have no idea what happened to the couple.  The physical therapist is someone I see moving about with patients on a regular basis, and she was busy with someone yesterday (Monday).  So, I guess she is doing well enough.

I relate this scenario, because it is a great example of the common rejoinder for someone in denial:  "Yes, but..."  Think of all the times that an observation has been made that you know, somewhere deep inside, has merit and truth, but just can't bring yourself to own it.  There is this internal mad scramble for something that will justify a response that counters the observation.  More than any other opening, we will start by saying, "Yes, but...."  or the slang "Yeah, but..."  It is a slick way to try to dodge the uncomfortably obvious.

Over the years, I have lost track of the number of times I have been in a pastorally sensitive situation that denied the obvious.  My role, as a priest giving counsel, is not to provide answers but to make observations, provide insights and guide the individual or group to form workable ways of moving forward with their dilemma.  In so many of those situations, I would lay out information and and data that was so obvious that it did everything but physically solve the issue.  Because the information meant owning a behavior, action or belief that was integral to their sense of identity, the respondent(s) would find all kinds of ways to blame it on others, fault the system or simply deny the truth of the observation altogether.  "Yes, but...."

Exercise

I began with a scenario of being "in the gym."  That is not quite an accurate name for where I exercise.  Its full title:  Sarasota Memorial Hospital HealthFit Center.  Sarasota Memorial Hospital (SMH) is one of several medical centers in the Bradenton-Sarasota metroplex.  It is, I believe, the largest.  It has a number of satellite centers that focus on specific health issues.  The HealtFit Center is located near where we live...in the southeast part of Sarasota...and it has facilities for neuro and cardiac rehab as well as a children's center across the street.  I can walk there from our house in less than 10 minutes.

The main exercise room of the Healthfit Center has a lot of "state-of-the-art" cardio-vascular equipment and machine weight equipment.  It also has a free-weight and universal gym area.  A separate area on one side of the room is specific to physical therapy.  On the opposite side is the cardiac rehab room.  Nurses and therapists both have patients who use the main room as part of their programs.  The building also has two pools, a jacuzzi, as steam room, an all-purpose court (basketball and other sports) and two aerobic rooms.  You want to do it, HealthFit has it.  The cost to belong is reasonable as well.

I am not an exercise nut, but I am enthusiastic about it.  This relationship with fitness began with Navy training.  It included a lot of "road work" and weight training.  For a number of years (after the two year break in seminary, mentioned in an earlier posting), my routine was 5 days of running 5-8 miles and three days of strength training with free-weights.  I used Hatha Yoga for stretching and staying limber.  I would vary the routine and mostly used the U.S. Army fitness guide as a platform.

My enthusiasm was sometimes strong enough that I did damage.  In 1974, I did the first injury to my right shoulder.  It set in motion the trouble that would happen that caused the replacement saga in 2010 and 2012. I also did some damage to the left shoulder with a different kind of lifting exercise.  It could become problematic.  I have blown out both knees in distance running accidents (a pothole and an uneven sidewalk) -- resulting in arthroscopic surgeries and arthritis.  Two foot injuries leading to surgeries.  Finally, a lower back compression due to a fall during a half marathon.  Two-thirds of those could have been prevented with proper "spotters" in the weight room (I failed to have someone spot...meaning be present to handle the weight if I lost control of a lift); or, by looking down a little more often on the road.

I no longer run.  My last official road/treadmill run was in summer 2000.  I no longer lift free-weights. That stopped in 2006.  I swam for a while, but the business with the shoulder has curtailed free-style swimming strokes.  

For the past few years, I have developed a program/routine that is still the 5/3 formula (five days aerobic/three days weight training).  Aerobic work is a combination of bike, stairmaster and elliptical rider.  I use a treadmill to warm up.  At my best, it is a 50 minute routine.  I am currently not at my best.  It is a 35 minute routine.

The weight training is now almost all machine.  If done properly, they provide accurate isolation of muscle groups and good control for both exertion and release.  I still use free-weights for bicep and tricep focus...or a universal gym (which is a bar-pulley system).  There have been some radical alterations with a prosthetic shoulder joint.  A year after the last replacement surgery (20 March 2012), I am able to do bicep and tricep work and upper back work.  I am not allowed to work the deltoid muscles yet, for fear (doctor's) of damaging the still growing bone in the joint.  

Pertaining to the opening of this post, I, too, was one of those who was exercising hard and still gaining weight.  I was even watching the amount of food intake.  Still the weight crept upward.  One of my primary care physicians suggested that I was simply "getting thicker, because you are getting older" (my 60th birthday physical).  

Truth:  I was gaining weight because I was, functionally, getting sick.  Fructose was getting stored in my liver and turned into triglycerides.  High triglycerides can indicate a metabolic syndrome -- the first stage of a diabetes diagnosis (mine were near 900 in 2007).  Sucrose was getting stored as glycogen in muscles cells that normally store fat.  So, I was eating a low fat diet and exercising 5 days/week -- and still slowly gaining weight.

By the time I was diagnosed with Type II Diabetes in May 2010, I was taking five medications to control cholesterol, triglycerides and the diabetes.  I was on two medications to deal with the coronary ectasia and attendant blood pressure issues.  I had all kinds of advice...most of which ended up being a chorus of: take your medications, exercise and behave yourself eating.

Now

I just finished reading a pivotal article in the latest edition of National Geographic.  It's about sugar, and it tells the whole story.  I commend this article to you.  It is well worth the time and information.

One can exercise and still gain weight.  One can exercise, be on a low-fat diet and still gain weight.  One can exercise, be on a low-fat diet and eat minimal meals and probably lose weight...at least for a while.  I did the latter in 2001 and did pretty well for about three years.  Then it started coming back...the weight that is.  It just started.  And, for sure, I did the "Yes, but..." routine.

Now, it's about turning the dial on my metabolic activity.  It's about breaking old patterns and habits.  It's about reclaiming what my body is designed to utilize for optimal function.  It's about the synthesis of activity, fuel and being centered on True Self.  

Today's metabolic data:

• Weight:  234.4.  I gained about a pound, but am told that it is an adjustment.  My net loss is still six pounds in as many days.
• Fasting Blood Glucose:  97.  Still within the 85-100 range necessary for control.  I ate a snack pack before bed (a mix of raw almonds and walnuts).
• Blood Pressure:  134/76.  It is modulating

Off to HealthFit.

[Note:  The opening quote is spoken by John Lennon before the song "Two of Us" begins.  There was a real John Hawtry (1914-1988) who did a lot of television, radio and stage acting...largely comic.  It was the image I got when I began thinking about this post.  Go figure]

Love and Blessings,

Fred+

A New Journey -- Part 5: Praying Shapes Believing

"Yes, my guard stood hard when abstract threats
Too noble to neglect
Deceived me into thinking
I had something to protect
Good and bad, I define these terms
Quite clear, no doubt, somehow
Ah, but I was so much older then
I'm younger than that now."

-- Lyrics by Bob Dylan, 1964, "My Back Pages" (Album:  "Another Side of Bob Dylan)

-- The Byrds, 1967 (Album:  "Younger Than Yesterday")

The title of this posting is not totally accurate to the text that will follow.  There is some of this, and the title, itself, is from one of my favorite books, Praying Shapes Believing: A Theological Commentary on the Book of Common Prayer, (1985) by the Rev. Dr. Leonel L. Mitchell.  There is some history here, in terms of my own journey.

My mentor and spiritual adviser in seminary was the Rev. Dr. Louis Weil.  Fr. Weil was professor of Liturgics and Sacramental Theology.  Louis Weil, Charles Price, Leonel Mitchell and Marion Hatchett were the most influential scholars in sacramental theology and worship in the Episcopal Church during the 20th Century.  There were others, but anyone from an accredited theological institution in the Episcopal, Roman Catholic and Lutheran Churches knew of these four -- and their works were required reading at all of our seminaries.  If they weren't, then I would say it's like calling a blood pressure of 140/90 "normal."  It isn't.

Dr. Louis Weil, 1975

My passion for good liturgy, my deep love for sacramental theology and its impact on daily spiritual life, and my own life of prayer came in great measure from my time with Louis Weil.  It was he who impacted Nashotah students from around 1973 until 1988.  Louis Weil spent his years from 1989 until retirement, a few years ago, at Church Divinity School of the Pacific, Berkeley, CA -- one of our seminaries.  CDSP is part of the Graduate Theological Union at Berkeley:  a  consortium of nine independent theological schools clustered around a major library and academic research center.  It was founded in 1962.  

When I became Dean of St. James Cathedral, South Bend, IN on 1 January 1993, I was wonderfully surprised to find that the Rev. Dr. Leonel Mitchell, who was then the Professor of Liturgics and Sacramental Theology at Seabury-Western Theological Seminary, Chicago, was an Honorary Canon of the Cathedral and would be retiring within a couple of years and moving back to South Bend.

Dr. Lee Mitchell, 2012

After his retirement, Lee Mitchell did return to a home they already owned in South Bend (he had been on the faculty of the University of Notre Dame for a number of years).  He became an adjunct on my staff, and we became very close friends.  His counsel, advice and creative energy allowed us to do some wonderful liturgical events at the Cathedral.  When I left the cathedral 11 years later, I had become much wiser in crafting liturgy.   It was a very sad moment for me to learn of Lee's death in 2012 during the time I was immobilized after replacement of my right shoulder joint at Mayo.  

The impact of these two priest scholars, and the others I mentioned, upon the modern Church came out of the discovery of a huge number of early Church documents and materials shortly after World War II.  These were the folks who were the designers of the 1979 Book of Common Prayer and our formal move from a medieval piety in the Church to a re-discovery of the joy and life-giving worship of those early centuries after Jesus.

Yesterday, the Gospel narrative included Jesus responding to the Disciples' request, "Teach us to Pray."  Jesus' response was the basis of what we now call "The Lord's Prayer."  It is no doubt the best known and recited prayers in Christendom -- and beyond.   At every liturgy in the Episcopal Church, this prayer is said by the congregation after the Eucharistic Prayer.  It is also said in all of the Daily Offices of the Church.  I have long been concerned as to whether we know what we are really doing when we say this prayer.

The Lord's Prayer, itself, is a model.  Break it down into its components, on one immediately sees a pattern that is universal in its implications for a conversation with God.   This came home to me yesterday, when the Rector of St. Boniface asked a question in his sermon, "Do our prayers shape us; or, do we use prayer to try to shape the world in our image?"

For the past three evenings at home, we have been watching a compilation series from the BBC (on DVD) entitled, "The Barchester Chronicles"  based on the novels of Anthony Trollope.  Trollope wrote in the 19th Century and parodied life in the Church of England during the Victorian Era.

I mention the Trollope stories, because it reminds me so very much of the machinations of both religious and secular organizations to influence culture and manipulate circumstances for their own best interests.  It reminded me that, during our Civil War, people on both sides prayed fervently that God would prevail on their particular side.  Same prayers -- opposing outcomes.  Who is right?

Ultimately, we need to realize that our attempts to change others by our own actions and by believing we have some kind of Divine mandate due to our "prayers" is probably the greatest of all sins....that of hubris...spiritual pride.

In Louis Weil's teaching and Leonel Mitchell's book, it was stressed continuously that the role of community worship is not to manipulate or impose our will upon those gathered, but to create a sustained community that can experience God's love and allow that to work deep within each person...for the sake of wholeness.

In our current milieu, there are politicians, journalists and religious leaders attempting to re-craft culture into a "God-fearing Nation" under a divine law that is mostly a projection of ego and looks very little like anything truly spiritual.  Besides, "God-fearing" is a medieval projection to act as an authoritarian control.  It leaves out "God is Love; and, Perfect Love Casts Out Fear," as well as Jesus' own prayer that "as I have loved you, love one another."  

In my own particular momentary circumstances, which is all for which I have been given ultimate responsibility, being fed up with diabetes and what orbits that condition is not enough in itself.  Trying to shape what my world should look like on a daily basis did not do any good.  When I finally, four weeks ago, simply entered into that silent space and asked what I needed to do to be all that I can be, it came to me that the journey would take a particular course.  I would have what I needed for the journey.  I simply had to take the first step.  All that I have related, the the previous postings, up to now began showing itself.  But, I had my part to do.

Asking and expecting God to cure my diabetes wasn't the route.  Offering the condition and asking what I need to accomplish to bring my health back into balance was the route.  That prayer seems to be shaping my life...on several levels...not just the physical.

Regardless of your tradition or background, how do you pray?  Is it like wielding a hammer; or is it with a desire to be reshaped?

Today's statistics are very interesting to me:

• Weight:  233.6 -- exactly seven pounds lighter than I was when I began Wednesday morning last week.  Pulling glycogen out of those liver and muscle cells.
• Fasting Blood Glucose:  87 -- a new record!  I have not registered a fasting glucose level this low since before I was diagnosed with diabetes.  Yesterday, it was 96.  Normal is 85-100
• Blood Pressure:  130/73 -- still being a booger.  Optimal for me will be 120/70.  This may have something to do with the medication that controls my coronary ectasia.  We'll see.

Food intake is still following the detox phase of purging glycogen stores and resetting my body's metabolic routine.  Just keep watching.

Love and Blessings,

Fred+

A New Journey -- Part 4: The Pork Club

They say every man needs protection

They say that every man must fall

Yet I swear I see my reflection

Somewhere so high above this wall. 

I see my light come shinin'

From the west down to the east

Any day now, any day now

I shall be released.

--Lyrics by Bob Dylan (1967)

--Sung by The Band, 1968 album, Music From Big Pink

U.S. Navy, 1974, On Assignment

When we were preparing to move from Lee's Summit, MO to Sarasota, FL in 2012, we were going through a lot of materials collected over our lifetimes...and those of our two, now adult, daughters.  I found the picture posted to the right.  I was 23 years old and in the U.S. Navy Submarine Corps, Atlantic Fleet.  I was stationed at our advance submarine base at Holy Loch, Scotland -- from early January 1973 to early February 1975 -- and on the staff of Submarine Squadron 14.  

My official work was handling personnel and transportation for the Commodore (senior Captain...not yet an Admiral).  I also had "unofficial duties."  Those adventures and experiences still remain mostly classified.  This picture was taken by a staff colleague as we crossed the Clyde River from Gourock to Dunoon on one of those "adventure" assignments.  Looks casual enough -- exactly as it was supposed to look.  Both my colleague and I looked Scottish, so we could have been young business men.  Note my hair was longer than military standards...for a reason.

I weighed 195 lbs in that photograph.  I remember this, because we had to stay at a certain level of physical readiness -- as well as have a keen alertness and ability to move quickly...very quickly.  So, I carried quite a bit of extra muscle in those days.

After three years of active duty, I began a program of active reserve duty that would allow me to attend a "professional graduate school."  The Navy defined such schools as: "A graduate school of medicine, dentistry, theology or veterinary medicine."  In August 1975, I began graduate studies in theology at Nashotah House Theological Seminary, Wisconsin-- one of the Episcopal Church's seminaries.

My lifestyle changed rather radically, I was either in class, at the library, in the chapel or at my desk in my room.  During those long days, there were meals, snacks and occasional get-togethers (read:  parties or cook-outs).  I began to gain weight, largely due to the shift in activity and the institutional diet high in carbohydrates and sugars.  By the end of my second year of the three year degree program, I had gained 35 lbs.  I do not have a picture of those particular days, but you can guess.  It wasn't muscle (most of the muscle mass I carried on active duty had diminished to that of a fairly sedentary lifestyle).

As we began our final year of academic studies, a group of us decided we were tired of being heavy and out of shape.  Several of us in the group had come out of the military straight into seminary.  Others had come from more active civilian lifestyles.  All of us were unhappy with how we looked and felt.  Bob Dylan's words spoke to us.

After consulting the Dean, we received permission to have the chef in our Refectory prepare special meals for us...along the guidelines of Weight Watchers.  We also made a pact to gather five mornings a week for a 3 mile run around West Nashotah Lake (the seminary sat on two lakes, West and East Nashotah Lakes.  Nashotah is a Menominee word meaning, "twin lakes).

In September 1977, seven of us began this program.  We wanted to support each other, and the Dean said he would permit the special meals as long as we were enrolled in a program.  We chose Weight Watchers, because there was a group that met fairly close to the seminary, in Oconomowoc, and we could do our weekly weigh-in on Friday evenings.

It was a hoot!  We ate our meals together and placed a sign in the middle of a table in the Refectory we had designated as "our spot."  The sign in the middle of the table simply read, The Pork Club:  Meeting Thrice Daily by Invitation.  Funny, no one seemed to want to sit with us.  

Tuesday through Saturday mornings, we gathered near the cemetery at the west end of the seminary property...along Mission Road...and, like a troop of recruits, we jogged around the lake.  First it was a slow pace.  We had gotten seriously out of shape over two years.  It gets cold early in Wisconsin.  As the ice and snow began, our running shoes could not well handle the icy roads.  A former Marine member of our group decided we should wear strap-on cleats.  This worked okay, but, as one professor told us (who lived near the lake), "You guys sound like the German Gestapo double-timing when you go by my house."  We tended to get into a cadenced rhythm, and the crack of the cleats on the icy surface did make a snappy racket.

The other bit of fun we had was at the Friday evening "weigh-in."  Seven of us relatively tall guys would enter the Weight Watchers building in the shopping plaza at 7:00pm.  Also in attendance were probably 25 folks -- a number of them being older women (50 and older...please remember we were in our mid twenties...The oldest of us being 29).  Every one of us would lose between 2.5 and 4 lbs each week...without fail.  We would proceed to high five one another, give some jaunty words of "attaboy" and then (almost with one voice) call out, "Off to Pizza Hut for cheat night."  We would leave about 25 folks looking after us with faces reflecting everything from jealous admiration to downright contempt.  

At the end of May 1978, we graduated with our Master's Degrees in Theology (M.Div.--a professional degree).  I was 35 lbs lighter...exactly what I was when I entered seminary three years earlier.  All but one of us achieved very similar results.  The Pork Club Rules!!

Ordination as a Priest 12/29/1978

By the time I was ordained a priest (December 1978), I weighed 190 lbs.  It was lower than my active military weight by five pounds, but I was also carrying less muscle.  I had substituted my military workout with a daily yoga/floor exercise routine and 5-8 mile run (5x/week).  My ordination photo appears at the left.

My best "fighting weight" as an older adult is 215 lbs.  It seems to be where I end up with a combination of cardio exercise and weight bearing exercise.  The time between December 2012 and April of this year (2013) have been tough.  Two major surgeries and literal immobilization for about five months in 2012 and foot surgery in February of this year kept me out of the gym.  My road running days are over -- blowouts on both knees and arthroscopic surgeries in 1996 and 2000.  Over the past year, I gained 18 lbs with relative inactivity.  

As I engage this new lifestyle "conversation" with diabetes, I am also cleared to re-engage my former level of physical fitness -- with modifications to protect my prosthetic right shoulder.  This has been a good first week.

Today's numbers (7/27/13):

• Weight -- 235.4 (total of 5.2 lbs lost in three days...whacking those glycogen stores)
• Blood Pressure -- 124/72
• Fasting Blood Glucose -- 101 (this, with weight, is the critical number.  Remember, I averaged 128.  That range was 123 to 135.  Two days at 99 and 101 consecutively is great news).
• Pedometer readings (new) -- on 7/26 -- 6,034 steps, covering 2.97 miles, burning 2,380 calories.

Love and Blessings!

Fred+